Chad Wallace is a friend and almost daily commenter on the blog here along with Dan2. He co-hosts and counts gumballs on our annual MBIP gumball counting post and lately I learned something about Chad, he’s somewhat schizophrenic when it comes to the store known as Menards. Check out the comment below.
His one world review off, “Yuck,” led me to jokingly say last week maybe I’d go to Menards for a snack in his honor. Below is his reply (number 3. in the comment) to that threat of mine.
So now he wants us to go there.
Well, all this can mean one thing and one thing only…
I hearby declare the last Friday in August to be: The First Annual International Chad Wallace Snack Celebration From: Menards!
Let’s go and start this special day and let the Menards snacking begin!
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The First Annual International Chad Wallace Snack Celebration From: Menards
Here we are at the Menards out on Townline Road in North Peoria.
Hey, check out the sign, how did they know about this special day? Especially since I just made it up about twenty minutes ago!
Let’s go inside and start our special Chad Wallace Snack Celebration Day at Menards!
This is a huge store, let’s go find the grocery section in here and find some snacks on this special Chad Wallace snacking day!
Holy screaming shitballs, more Halloween in August madness. Ugh!
Here’s the grocery section and check out the sign over there! They’ve really gotten into the spirit of this festive Chad Wallace holiday!
And the snack aisle has a nice tribute, I love it!
Lot’s of snacks to choose from in here, let’s grab some and head on back to the MBIP World Headquarters.
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MBIP World Headquarters Snacking Area
We’re here back at the MBIP World Headquarters Snacking Area and check out the bag! Menards pulled out all stops on this special Chad Wallace Snack Celebration!
Okay, time to reveal the three snacks for this special celebratory snack day!
Here’s our trio of snacks from the shelves of Menards. Okay, let’s begin our special Chad Wallace Menards Snack Celebration!
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Chad Wallace Snack Celebration Number One
For the first snack, we’ll chomp on this Sprecher Taproom Snacks Beer Cheese Mix.
This was a nice mix of peanuts and crackers and it had a tasty salty savory flavor, but it didn’t really have much of a beer cheese flavor, so a little bit of a disappointment.
Let’s just keep moving along here.
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Chad Wallace Snack Celebration Number Two
Reese’s Popped Snack Mix sounded like a tasty mix of sweet snack items, let’s dig in!
This looks like a delightful and tasty snack mix, but we’ll eat the items one at a time and not in a mix. I’ll explain why, below.
The mini peanut butter cups and chocolate and toffee flavored popcorn were sweet treats, but we ate them one at a time to avoid eating the pretzels in the mix.
Why skip the pretzels? Well, the answer to that is below.
Chad Wallace hates pretzels, so we certainly can’t eat them on this special Chad Wallace snacking celebration from Menards. So there.
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Chad Wallace Snack Celebration Number Three
Okay, I chose this snack to show how you should not name a snack.
Poppycock? Are you fucking kidding me?
This is the most incestuous title since Dr. Seuss penned his sickening and vomit-inducing incest memoir, Hop On Pop!
Whoever titled this snack, obviously had some “Daddy issues.”
I mean, Poppycock? Give me a break and it gets even worse.
This snack is covered in Poppycock’s, “Amazing Glaze.” Excuse me while I go barf up a lung! I’m never going to be able to listen to the song “Amazing Grace” again! Thanks, Poppycock!
If you’re going to call your snack, Poppycock, you might as well just spell it out for folks. So I’ve supplied the following Top Three List for alternative names for Poppycock.
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The Top Three Alternative Names For Poppycock
Number 3: Daddy’s Dick Mix.
Number 2: Pop’s Cock Snack Mix Slathered in Daddy Dong Sauce.
And now…the number one alternative title for Poppycock…drumroll please…
Number 1: My Father’s Penis.
And on that happy note, we hope you all enjoyed the First Annual International Chad Wallace Snack Celebration From: Menards!
Maybe next year Chad can join us for this snack-filled holiday. I would’ve invited him this year, but like I said, I just thought of it twenty minutes before I went to Menards!
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Related Posts: Friday Bites @: Dollar Tree, Walgreens Nice! Pretzel Snacks and Classic Snack Crackers With Easy/Sleazy Cheese.